A recent comment I made in Mr Endoh’s blog warranted an answer below. I asked the blogger Mr Endoh if he feels vulnerable meeting fellow bloggers in person when he is not one who is shy about exposing himself naked in his blog. No, I’m not talking about the ‘Penthouse’ kind of nudity. (yeah, I wish too :-P) I’m merely saying he is one who is not afraid to write down his inner thoughts and share his insight from virginity to religion.
This is a portion of the reply he gave me..
I don’t think I will feel vulnerable, since I have been honest with things I have written based on my own analysis and understanding. I could be wrong in thinking in certain ways, but at least it truthfully came from my heart. ……
This has got me thinking. Sure, I write alot of stuffs on my blog. I do open up alot when I’m writing to people I do not know. Yes, you can argue bloggers do in time develop a certain relationship with their readers or fellow bloggers. I agree. But then many would agree with me too that blogging acquaintanceship is still different from friends whom we know in person. Especially old friends who witnessed the ups and downs in our life real time. Another difference I can say off hand is the fact blogging on the internet give bloggers the advantage of ‘conditional exposé.‘
I stole a line from a book I read that best illustrate conditional exposé.
Leornado Da Vinci wrote every painter should begin a canvas with a black wash because all things in nature are dark except where exposed by the light. Most painters do the opposite and start with a whitewash and adding the shadows last. Leoarnado knew the value of starting with the shadows. The only things people can ever know about you are the ones you let them see.
Substitute the word painter with blogger and it still holds true. Personally, I believe it is liberating if I can just disregard the fear of people not liking what they see. The truth is, despite all the years, I still have the puppy mentality in me. Puppy likes to please. They’ll do the darnest thing just to be loved… or accepted. If I can overcome the hurdle, I bet I’ll be a much happier person. Not only in the blogospere, I meant my real life. 
Damn, then I think I’ll start debating with my cell leader on the issue ‘are Roman Catholics saved?’ I had hold my tongue long enough…. 
This entry was posted on Thursday, November 8th, 2007 at 2:05 pm and is filed under Bloggings, personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
I like to show my true self and not blog behind a mask becos I don when I will be meeting those who reads my blogs. If I potray myself as someone that I am not, it will be difficult to keep up the act in real life.
No matter what you do, there will be some who likes and some who dun like someone’s blog. Its harder trying to please everyone. It is best to just be yer self..:-)
Costa - I’ll know one day when I drop by PD. lol
Shireen- I’m not worried about my blogging persona. I don’t care at all if ppl dun like my blog. For all I care dun drop by. The dilemma is being as open as I am on my blog as in my real life. Many times in real life there are ppl we are thrown together by circumstances. We have no say. That is why I find I cannot be as open about my thots to these ppl. There are plenty of considerations whether I should be as open in real life. Where else in blogs, if I dun like someone, I just don’t go to their blog. And vice versa.
It’s less complicating when it comes to blog.
But then many would agree with me too that blogging acquaintanceship is still different from friends whom we know in person.
Yes, despite what I have said, I still agree very very wholeheartedly with this statement of yours. Real life friends and blogging friends are very different, especially when we are truthful and the other party ain’t.
The way I see it in my blog is, I have already subconsciously censored certain issues that I will not blog about. Take for instance, people whom went through my archives would have realised I am a divorcee. I have been transparent to “declare” my status upfront, but that doesn’t mean I have to go into details and throw everything out on my blog. Granted, that I have already been transparent enough, I should not be having problems dealing with vulnerability.
Of course, that’s only what I feel. I do know there are people who are uncomfortable to reveal their divorcee status.
Ed - Yes, I read that too.. along with the virginity post. What to do? Catchy title mar… THere’s nothing wrong declaring your marital status. I know some married bloggers declare themselves single and available. lol
I wonder what’s the point. Do they start a blog to hook babes or look for extramarital affairs? ;-(